善

我至今仍然坚持认为善心是虚伪的道德掩饰. 人永远是以自己为中心的, 当然这并无所谓好坏, 本来这世界关于好坏的定义不过来源于是否可以节省大多数人的时间或者满足大多数人的口味. 媚俗的俗也不过是这'好'的代名词罢了.
我常常懊恼于'古董'们诱导或威逼年轻未知者走上这人类的老路, 剥却原始创造的冲动和叛逆的本性. 他们真是'自大'的可以, 自大到忘记自己也不过是大自然的一次失败的创造. 某种程度上我真的宁可去做一个机器人, 用直线的思维方式观察世界, 获得的往往是撕裂谎言而后的真相. 真相之难能可贵正是因为人类对世界的曲解以及对同类的排斥.

HD WOW~

It seems something different from previous two semesters. I'm really quite confused about what i'm now being these days, especially when i obtain my assignments result, besides the HD i got on accounting theory like i mentioned before, the other HD and 3 D have been marked subsequently...WOW~~~ How could that happen??? Is that the problem of those professors??? I know I should feel FANTASTIC about these splendid high marks, but why more thoughts of confusion instead of that of success are flying in my head?

I used to be thought of a loser of assignment before, luckliy only myself have knowledge of why i can't win the appreciation of teacher's -- i never did give enough time and attention on them. So if i WAS losing the battle all the time, i should go on been defeated because i don't even thought of a change to myself. .. Someone said it's because the difference exists between western and easten people, but it changes a bit fast here. Anyway, it's still a good thing, しれない, if they treated the assignments seriously, then the only explaination is i am getting intellegent or, they just got bored on those strange gramma and marked by their will, then i should stop cheat myself. Acturally it is possible to cheat either way because it's the period of evaluation, a high mark is realy a good choice to either student or teacher without any lose on both sides. If the truth seats on the latter one. Then WHAT A BEAUTIFUL WORLD~~~

STILL

又到学期终结时, 可是近来完全没有复习的状态, 如果不是ERIC力邀一起念书, 我的魂魄还不知道又飘到哪个朝代去了. 我果然还是一个无论如何无法独居的人, 但这样的事实曾是我极力无法认同的, 因为我从来都不属于谁, 但是现在反而渐渐发现, 自己越来越无法离开谁了, 他们给了我求生的欲望, 但曾经的幻念仍然残存于心, 此消彼长的两种力量, 让我常常觉得道德在沦丧.

自由太轻了, 轻得让我无法承受, 我常常表示满不在乎, 想要虐待别人和我一起游离. 但也曾发出想要回归现实的讯号, 可是这个SOS却发错了地方, 或者方式不对, 总之他是弃我之不顾的. 但是我也不至因此而放弃这一可能性, 总有一天琴声会传到人的耳朵里, 我必须如此相信.

oh my bed..

Finaly..i've got a bed...The IKEA stuff delivered it to my place this afternoon, of course, without helping me to build it, it's also the reason of the cheap price they can bottom at..So acturally what i bought is a bounch of woods with standard holes to build the nails in. I spent around 2 hours to play with this huge adult toy, really enjoy it.

Chuan taste

Today I spent 'a lot of' money on two things that actually very important to me. One of them is I bought a bed from IKEA, which means the days i slept on the 'floor' can be finally ended since the beginning of this year; The other thing is I challanged the Chuan Cai that broke the record of no hot taste. And the result is -- i need MORE.

The restraurant is located in the China Town in the city of Melbourne. The business is very booming, the reception people asked us that if we researved ahead of time, with the answer that no booking, he left the reception for a while to find out wheather there was still table available, and luckily, we don't have to wait. The inside of the restraurant is..very crowded, the passageway is so narrow that only can alow one people to get through, which is a totaly different from some traditional westen dining room that always giving an impression of spacious and lightness. But such style do be appreciated by many Chinese people, i can't tell the exact reason, it's a convention that lasted for thousands of years, and we just receive it naturally. So what i want express here is there is no acturally good or bad cretiaria based on wheather spacious or not, it's just an issue of habit.

Ok, let's get back to the theme of Chuan Cai. In fact, the restraurant is not that othodox if compared with the real ones in Cheng Du, because the taste seems not 'extremely' hot as describing by some Chuan Cai lovers, at least I can afford it without tears coming out! I believe it's the strategy that adjust to more people's taste, especially locals, although a little bit disappointed about it, the experence is still perfec, as my friend said, if i cannot afford the hot taste training in one step, seperating it into several paces is better. Anyway, one of my favourate course is hot chicken, with a great many of chilly, the chicken seems like burning in the fire..feeling dizzy if staring at them long time.

好困好困, 不想写E文了今天, 辣子鸡味道不错, 就是淡了点, 虽然此话出自我口稍显大言不惭, 但如果可以辣得够味儿到是可以一了心愿了. 其实本来今天是要去另一家据说很正宗的川菜馆的, 但是在门口张望了一下发现内部设施有点'恐怖'...这样说一家餐厅好象它是一家黑店似的, 其实不然, 只是白帜灯光线闪烁下大排挡STYLEのずくえといす摆设实在让人看了胃口便倒去一半, 奇怪这么一个注重食品卫生的城市为何无人来查, 反而生意兴隆名传千里, 至少在华人世界是无人不晓的, 难道大家都为了一时口舌之快包容DIRTY? 而且有传说用樱粟做料吸引回头客... 我有好奇的冲动去尝试一次, 但绝无SECOND TIME! AHHHH....这种话和吸毒者的口气怎么这么像~~~~~

Tokyo love story

I just finished the 東京ラブストーリー, a touched love story decade ago. Exactly I've watched it when it first released, but all I can remember is the only scence that リカ and kanji met each at the football squall at kanji's junior school while リカ want to experience her lover's memory and try to become a part of it -- she carved her name beside kanji's. Even though, they got seperate finally, which almost became the greatest regret in many audiences' heart at that time.

Even i've read it again today, i feel very upset especially when リカ didn't wait kanji make a choice, taking the 4:33 train, instead of their appointing time 4:48. She cried when looking at the photo of that school, of that history that she would never enter into. She's afraid of lonely in this world, so she gave her all to kanji that too heavy to afford to him at that time. I really believe that they can be together if everything become slower and kanji to be a more mature man, it's only a matter of time, which i see it as so-called fate. In this point, I really appreciate director's desion that he didn't arrange a perfect result that "All shall be well,and Jack shall have Jill", in contrary, kanji married to his first love, when they met 3 years later in the street corner by accident, everything changed and seems went back to the original point. リカ always be with the most beautiful smile, although facing with many embarrasted situation, she never stop facing them with smile.

太感动了, 莉香的坚强让我震撼, 她的笑容可以化解一切艰难, '即使明天是困难的, 也要充满期待地面对', 哎, 和她比起来, 我真是个超烂的寄生虫. 难怪这部片子感动了那么多人, 我那时候只沉迷日高巧美和火野恭一, 可是这部更早的电视剧竟然感动着现在的我. 精神果然是超越时空的, 李大师说的没错, 唯心绝不是教科书上断章取义般的丑化. 在这一点上, 我得删自己一巴掌. 因为曾经我也教条刻板过. 幸好, 幸好, 那只是过去时（ました）. 日醒吾身, 切记, 切记. 人还是感性一点的好, 否则, 和一块充满个人色彩逻辑的僵石又有什么区别呢?

75 tram

This noon when i was on my way to school, an 'unexpectable' thing happened that the tram broken by accident! The driver tried several times to restart the system but it didn't work. Even though it's still not the wirst thing. Since the street here is very narrow that only 2 lines for a direction, one of them serviced as temperary parking region, the remained one is for the moving cars, where also shared by the tram track. So once the tram stop its way, the subsiquencial cars, or even other trams will also be blocked.

The driver explained to us that it may cost 3-4 mins if we are all lucky, but finaly we hadn't got it. After around 10 mins' waiting ( I'm still luck because i got my palm with me, and a camera), all the passengers are required to take off the tram for another one. Then we saw a 'splendid' sence: the very long queen of transport than almost cannot see the end, especially when 4 trams appear at the same time. I think it should be very rare because many locals appears very excited about it, they even pick up the phone talking to their friends that it happened.
I would plan to take some photos of some special plant, but seems such scene worth more to pictured.

我似乎已经渐渐习惯了从住处到学校的遥远旅途, 一次TRAIN两次TRAM的转换早就把我磨的没了脾气. 今天还特意去学校新扩建的大楼转了一圈, 如此一来步行的路程总共加起来也将近20分钟了. 哎, 真是拔山涉水. 于是现在越来越佩服古人, 就算是乾隆下江南一路上的辛苦也不是今人能够轻松响应的吧. 现在的人真的是退化了. 惭愧, 惭愧.

发呆

对着屏幕发呆, 不知道想写什么. 最近发生了太多事, 作业忙得焦头烂额, 某人又与我争吵说什么付出没有回报. 我只能说这个人与机器人无异, 遂弃之也无伤大雅了. JEFFISH说"你就当行行好放了人家吧", 我哈哈大笑, 的确, 的确.

其实心理应该觉得轻松(果然是萨宾娜试的人物), 可是我似乎又开始寻觅新的枷锁. 因为没有承受压力就无法试图摆脱. 人就是这样矛盾的生物, 老子是超脱生物的, 如果他果真抛弃了一切'本能'. 罢, 罢, 整天思虑这些不着边际的'天上宫阙'又有何用, 只会让我越来越失却求生的欲望, 智商这东西真是coin with two sides, 可以助你直登青天, 也能让你陷入地狱般的无法自拔. 而我现在显然是属于后者的. 可是我同时又有一点沾沾自喜, 就为那看似不同寻常的一点点感知.

不过最近也有两件事让我颇感欣慰, 其一便是我终于可以看懂纪昀的<阅微草堂笔记>了, 记得两年多前翻阅时还处于完全不知所云的状态, 不知道是不是因为看过的一点<资治通鉴>柏洋版起了作用, 现在对自己的古文还是小有信心的. 其二便是我的accounting theory的作业居然拿了HD~哎, 这真是本年度最大的谎言, JEAN老师你是不是看花眼了, 因为我实在对自己的'作品'不敢恭维. 还是中西思维差异在这里产生了化学反应. 总之我是不会去向你求证的, 在ACCOUNTING这条路上, 我自觉是老朽踏上黄泉, 将来靠之混口饭吃供养双亲亦是尽了孝道, 足矣, 足矣.

i still love MD

Yesterday when i searched around the internet looking for the place in Aus where i can buy a mini disc for my new friend -- SONY MZ-RH1, i found a very interesting bbs special for the MD. Although nowadays MD seems tent to dissappear from people's eyes, maybe it's because the comprehensive use of Ipod putting a big rock in front of MD's road, i still feel no other media devices can be as specialist as MD does, particularly when it comes to the age of HI-MD, i really think it's the most perfect model i've ever seen!! So i can see why such website can still existe today.. and i'll add the address to 'my favourate' icon later.

these i'm doing the accounting theroy assignment, which is very tough to handle, because in this area the problems are much more than that of solved. so in such situation it's very hard for a beginner to insist on one side of attitude that required by the professor, since in fact every theory has its reason that exist, then how can i only focus on one demenstration while negating everything else? tough choice anyway.. Now i've already finished half of this assignment, and really feel unconfident it...

Anyway, look i've had every morning, bread + avacado with solts on , deeply appreciate on them

look what i've done these days..

Since I finished last assignment, i spent little time on study but pay a lot attention on various daily issues, such as transfering some of my money to the term deposite whose interest is very attractive nowadays. acturely if not my mother press me to do so time by time, i really lazy to enter into the bank, waiting in line, describing what i want to the clerk with my tough spoken en, for a reason of lack of the concept of the money to a litter extent which may because i didn't earn thm myself..anyway, another thing that haunted me for a long time has also been done, after 3 weeks waiting, my permission for work finally applied, I went to immigration to finish the last process on Monday, the recepsionest said busy Monday morning all the time..i returned a smile as it's worth to waiting. anyway, the immigration of Aus may be the busiest one all over the world..

These days i tried many different food featured in Mel's supermarket(coles & safeway) and also didn't forget to take photos of them sharing with u.. The most favoured one in my mind is a frute called Avocado, introduced by kai, telling me that it's offen a subsition of butter to vegiteriences. So without hesitation i bought one to have a happy try once i got my kichen, putting them between two bread with a litter solts on and it's really delicious!! But once i knew avocado is the king of fat among fruit, i stopped my pace of crazy eating although the incentive to buy one everytime i passed by doesn't disappear all the time..here are some images of it.

Another food i ofter purchased is the cold finished serise, like Asien taste noodle with noknown vegetable, corn and lotus seed salad(weird, isn't it?).

they r all beautiful

As i joined a group assignment, which provided a good chance to know other people, my mailbox is full of message about their process of work. In the past year although i've also completed assignment with someone else, most of the time it's very unformal, like each one just finished their part and then allocated them together without group meetings that everyone sitting around to talk about the case as a whole. However, this time we held more than 3 times meeting to discuss what this case was talking about, what the professor want, how we finish each other's job and finely how to put them together naturely and consistently.

It's a very good sample to do a group job, i took the responsibility of printing of $2.97 since i want to keep the hard copy returned by the professor with comments on as a momento. The next assignment is still the same case but the requirement is more in detail. I think i'd better ceasing keeping in quiet in the meeting, just try to say something...acturally i'm a little unconfidence about my spoken english, although 4 out of 5 group members have the mandary backgroud that i don't have to concern the language thing, the question that 'what did she say' always make me feel sorry for her and i don't think it's the right direction to go along. So just try to break the mind-set and throw my face!!!

They r all beautiful with differnent but easy-going personality, then how could i refuse to speak to all these people with young hearts inside? Wishing i can be one of them, and thx to u all: Karen, Cathy, Rusafa, and Eric >^^<

vegetarian

I think i'm a candidate of vegetarian.

Acturally it's not absolutely wrong thing for me to eat meat, human as omnivorous animals, in my mind, should be forgiven for hunting other animals, as no matter how noble the spirit is, we can't live without our body. Disobey with the order of brain can do some hurt because the brain is meant to protect the body itself. However, the reason for refusing meat maybe represent a updating of some people, or may be just making an unnesessary movement, it's not important..what i do is just by my will, nothing more, nothing concerned with morality. To be a vegetarian make me feel relax. I love animals, which should be enjoy equal rights in the earth with human beings.

blablabla

Long time no write..I know there must be some grammar mistake here but u do understand what i mean, do u?

A lot of assignments waiting for me, but i just leave them away at this moment as it's really a good time to relax, quiet background, fantastic towa tei. Nothing special happaned these days, i went for lectures as usual, except the morning ones for spring's coming that always make me hard to wake up. anyway, the weather changes its face without rules, just like today, I was forced to get up for the shining suns lightng on my eyes, but a heavy cold rain wet my coat at the dawn, and now everything going quiet again...

Tomorrow i'll go to library preparing my assignments, a great many references need to be read, acturally i don't bother to be with them, only if i can be as quiet in my heart as possible. reading is a thing to enjoy, assignment too.

fat girl me

Nothing want to be written today, I got up at the noon and pretented to read several lecture slices althought no one looking at me acturally. Before the roommate started the clearing job, i went out at the excuse of returning the book.

Many people were in the libery, enjoying their reading time with friends, and children, pity the pet are not allowed going inside. I picked up 2cd(one is Bobby Brown whom i've listened his songs when i was 14 or 15 years old), 2dvd(pilot Mexico and The Invisible Man(1933)) and a book called Mortal Danger whose cover being as similar style as the Minority Report. Then they're my weekend relaxing tool..

When I went back, safeway was one of the destination of this tiny trip. To eat up the remained Doritos Salsa, i brought back Mexico taste corn chips to join in, and two meat pie which are in a great discount, and a banana, opps..expensive all the time -- wishing it could be my last time to purchase such banana in my life!

And that's my today, or say, every weekend day...

Eric, u'll be fine..

Today Eric told me that he would take bus with me after studing, then i know something bad must have happened to his car, but thank god, no injury to him...It took place at around 11pm last night when he back the car or sth like that -- not very clear about his describe since his mandary is really really confusing although we've been friends almost half a year. Anyway, the consequence is very serious that not only all 4 wheels have to be replaced, some public asset broken fees will be paid which may be a big spitting blood...the even more worse thing is he haven't made a full of his tuition fees....orzorz.....if such things occur to me, i'd rather die...good luck Eric, u'll be fine..

Anyway, windy days coming, told by an older in the tram station in the noon, and she said she even can't keep her milk glass in balance in the morning. Sometimes i look up the sky, finding that it's just like the other ground, the clouds shaping their body in various appearences quickly without any trace. I remember when i first arrived at MEL, the pure sky and some floating cotton candy clouds shocked me a lot. And i'm still amazed at them till now...

assignment

Didn't sleep last night for the first assignment this semester. Cause it's the group work and a meeting would be held this afternoon, I was forced to finish those 1000 words about IKEA case before meeting time. Acturally I was planned to write from 7pm and completed them around 3 or 4am in the morning, so before the class began at 10am, i still could rest for 5 hours that is definitely better than no sleep. But things always go contrary to one's wishes, once Toshi went on-line, a talk show between us opened its prologue, of which the content covered our loved stars to different world view, and when I realized the time didn't stop its pace when i was not at my job, it's already 0:00 in the mid-night...orz...

After 7 hours continuous working on my assignment, i saw the light of successful had come. It's a long time ago since i saw the morning sun shine last time, everything is beauty and quiet that a bit differnt from my hometown where various birds singing subsequence to each other, but here is so quiet that i usually wondered where all those cute tiny spirits lived in...

hello goodbye

I've no idea that where this idea came out from lang's brain, rebuilding our COSMOS badm&voli club would be undoubltly the best way to remember our beautiful past which already grown as part of our body, i can see those unforgetable sights from my skin, from hand, and from my heart.

We talked till the late night coming through the internet. Me and chu travel in Australia, liu studies in German, lang stay at our homeland and already found a good job, and also his future wife..I just can't imagine that how time flies...we are friends since we were born, lang is 2 years smaller than us, so we always got confused about why he preferred to join us instead of playing with the same ages, even for a time we even tried to get rid of him and made many funning stories, such as we pretending not at home when he knocking the door while the phone call rang, and i remember he said loudly outside that picking up the phone@@@.

.....i just can't stop thinking the old days, especially when i'm by myself in the strange environment surrounded by those so-called friends. Acturally the reason i hate such relationship with these familiar people is led by a exchange equally mind-set. I know it's the bacic and hindding rules in the ways of society, but i just don't want to think that way. What i want is doing by your will, which means i can do you a favour, but it's absolutely not indicated that some rewards are needed. I do is because i like without according to the ethic standard. Unfortuanitily, there are always a kind of people who not only limite themselves to that rule, but tent to set others, especially those not familiar with this ugly society, into their mind. So in order to not being impacted by this pollutioned river, i'd rather close my heart and eyes in front of them, everyday is a new day with new pure air, but they belong to the old and foul corner forever.

looking through the window

I just found that many people share a same habit that when walking on a street where there are some shoppings seat aside, they tent to have a glance at those show windows, especially women who taking over much more proportion. Of course, girl, like you, could defend yourself by just looking at the clothings or decorations displayed inside. But if being asked what they looked, i think most of them won't get the right answer, because what they really noticed are themselves.

The reason for that seems obvious -- similar looking through the mirror at home, people need to inspect themselves in the public space, then these display windows reasonably play a role of 'walking mirror', relecting girls or boys at any time. I'm not sure whether the first person who creat this way of advertising the products thought of such a result, but apparently, the effect must be diminished nowadays. So imaging that if the class could be made 100% transparency that only jewaries wore by models can be appreciated by the passer-by insdead of thoes wore on their own necks, the sellors may enjoy a higher sale volumes as well.

i didn't get in

Shame of me, I looked through the windows with a resume in my hand, people enjoy their happy lauch time inside with flexiable music fully around. I don't know what i'm afraid of, is that my clothes that looked out of fasion, or the whelk living on my face? i just have no enough confidence to push the door, always like that.

Tomorrow, i'll have a try, with suitable clothes on, then less excuse to turn to.

rainbow

Today i was on my way to school. neither the train or tram were not easy to wait for after 4pm coming the peak time of going off work or study. When I reached the Malvin train station and walked to the tram station, big winds, with little raindrops kissing my face, rock my clothes and scarf that hardly get controlled. I used said that i've got insensitive about the weather here but such sudden change still catch me unaware.

When i was standing in the 駅, to my great surprise, two rainbows just appeared and seemed not far, a bit like rising from a row of low buildings that been lighted shiney. One of them gone quickly but the remain one flashed as clear as possible which never manifested itself that much in my impression. And it's almost very easy to tell the different colours from each other. The last I saw rainbows was at great ocien road, but busy job in photographing took up the chance to appreciate them through my eyes. Thank god i haven't bring a camera this time.

I enjoyed it myself, while remembering the story describing in むしし, a boy chasing a mushi that look like a rainbow whose the only difference seat in the order of colour. So every time i saw a rainbow, i can't help checking the colour order that seems that story is real. The more nature sight i watched in Aus, the more i 'm sure that 漆原友纪さん must have travelled here for a time, a mountain with a round hole, rainbows showing themselves any time any place..it's my pleasure to be in the same place with her negeleting the time.

janet janet

I shouldn't promise myself to write diaries every day, especially when nothing worth to say..I'm not at the mood today, can't concentrate on the lecture, even music was not as attractive as usual. maybe it's because i got up too early in the morning for two days in succession. I hate to go straight from my bed to the lecture room which begin at 10am without the breakfast or even clear my face and tooth. Since i moved here half a year ago, such early morning life sick me a lot, not only because i'm a night-active animal, but the crowd of people in the early train. Anyway, there are only two such days in a week and i'm planning to move one of them to the night class beginning at 6pm. Definitely it's a good idea to me since everything could attract my eyes except the textbook and studyguide between 6pm-10pm, although the professors may not do their job as seriously as the day-class, everything has a cost and i think it's worth to do.

I'm not very easy to fall into the influence of divination, but it's better for me to have a check provided by the MSN today(japan virsion) based on astrology. Because i'm going to apply for a part-time job in a local resturant, called tramstop, very small and what is of importance to me is no experence nesseary! Besides, the time and place are also suitable. What a good chance! I really should have a try! GOOD LUCK to myself!!!

my whole collection of YUKI UCHIDA>^-^<

it's cold, again

There is a big wind today. The sun tried to give all its lights to us but can't reach that by the clouds quickening their paces to somewhere disappearing between the sky and the sea. My hair can't stop dancing in the wind although hiding the road i'm walking on. Such wether also happens in my hometown but not as cold as here, Eric said it's because the wind in Aus came from The Antarctic Pole with flavour of the ice. I think he's right, we're so near to the end of the earth, fortuanitly, not the end of the world.

suck me!

Look what i've done yesterday: i throwed the cloths that stored up for 2 weeks into the washing machine, swiching on the power, opening the water tap..opps..i forgot to tip the washing powder!! u could say that i can stop the machine and pour it in then. But, it's already too late to realized the thing after airing them in my room.. u know how i found it? because today when enter into my room, no smell of washing powder was wafted to me as usual. so stupid am i, even though i dont think these cloths would be reclear with washing powder again, i'm a lazy lady as u know all the time...

I just held a phone 5 mins earlier, surprisely, someone who want to buy my second-hand textbook that i advertised it on the billboard in my school several days ago, is just my classmate! oh..this world is definitely small! More coincidentely, i help one of my friend sell another textbook to this girl last week and plan to bring it to her this 水曜日, seems my shoulder will break heavy load...So i've got a question that why westen textbook are so heavy? or say, do they have to be produced in this mode? In my country, bringing two or three books at the same time is very offten and we won't feel it that hard for taking, since the paper used to making book is nomal type, just a bit like the copy paper, so the weight will be more lighter than the one that using advertising paper, like the book here in Aus. I used to ask such question to a classmate from HongKong, he said the reason is that it's more convinient to read because there are some vivid colours and pictures, and also the weight let them feel profession on the subject...Then that means, in my mind, boring words can be not that boring with some make-up to them...but to me, it's all the same...

The Unbearable Lightness Of Being

another boring day gone.. i did nothing but finishing reading the book called The Unbearable Lightness Of Being, whose writer is MILAN KUNDERA from Czechia. I've read it around 1 year ago, if it not were one of my friend spoken of it, i almost forgot that i've read it before. Surprise but not shame of it, because for this book, it's very hard to understand without an accumulation of knowledge, from philosophy, politic to love. And apperently, i have no ability to understand the content even a little a year before. Even now, i dare not say that i got a definitely idea about what the author want to express. but undoubltly, all these stories, theory cited serve to a key point, which, in my mind, are also suffered from the Milan himself, of unliberty consequence brought from the invasion of Russia, that keeping the people within the bounds of one thought, same behavour from the activity of closing the entertainment place, prohibiting the right of talking that different from the center's rules and also incuding striking the intelligent people.

When I think about this novel, an article, written by Lu Xun, one of the most famous Chinese writer, always comes into my mind, whose content in general has some relation to it, maybe similar..and the reason for that maybe because these two countries suffered from a similar history background -- they both being impacted seriously by Russial. That artical discuss a strategy often applied in the war, that destroying all the resource of a district seized by the enermy troops to prolong the time period of the war for the purpose that waiting for the rescue army or force the enermy to leave. Oberviously, it's orientated by the defending strategy. Unforturnitely, the government misuse this way as a tool to limit the freedom of people. For example, forbidding girls joining the entainment activity, that is just the same way mentioned in Milan's book.

What a darkness history of human. Even though, some parts of the world still govern their people centralized, indifferencal, and try to build up a nation with same kind of people, or say, benifit first to the group. How stupid it is in nowadays world...

profession

First time i got to know this word is in my English textbook of junior school as the form of professor shown in the word list. I bear firmly in my mind quickly originated from a memory of my father's story when he's travelled around the world. He often talked about his professor, a very knowledged and famous sicientist in British, who also came to my home once many years ago with a Parker pen as a present to me.

today, several yeas later, i notice this word again, coincidently, still from my textbook -- Mordern Auditing. And this time i was totally confused about what i was reading about when reviewing chapter 2, because what these almost 40 pages concerned seems not about the auditing itself, but in the light of philosephy, in detail for example, what is profession? ... Actually in my mind, or say, according to some so-called general rules, the first 1 or 2 chaper should have an overall introduction of what auditing is, like what educators do in my country. So here is another place i can feel something different after a year's living in this nation, and seems more deeply than any superficious point, that the westen people used to put the philosophy rationaly in the first position before any subject. Of course it's based on they enjoy the legally right of liberty of the beliefs and can argue with each other.

As a result, before they decribe a certain theory, the philosophy part would always be expressed first because it's the root of every hypothesis and directs the behaviour model of people when carrying out in practice. In contrary, we rarely invole such purely thinking in any introduction part in our country, most time we just being told what should do but why do like that. Definitely i'm now more favour the westen style of education, for sometimes the reason plays a more important role than concequence, and everybody should know it no matter what school people make a choice.

it rains cats and dogs

I am already totally insensitive about the weather here in MEL. Although learned some knowledge that 4 seasons' sight would got a show each all together in one day before coming here, especially that the quilt is still needed at the night in summer that even make me exciting, it still brought me many trouble all the time that drove me crary for a time...

When i was in my first half year, the puzzle i have to face was to judge the temperature of the outside..i know it sounds wired, but it really difficult to make an assessment just by looking through the window! The most often situation is all the indications showed that it should be sunny and warm day, people wear little, flowers and bees enjoy beautiful sunshine, however, when i went out with 'suitable' qualitity of clothes, i realized that all the scence i saw were not enough to be the basic to dicide wheather should i wear one more coat.

The reason I was 'cheated' is that I still justify the new environment with my old standard. people here are not afraid of cold winter, flowers and trees are won't hide their lifely side either, which are totally different from my home country.

After all this year's chaos life, the luky thing is i've already used to such unregular weather condition, although there is still something exceed what is proper happens occasionly. Like today, the sun shows clearly in the sky in the noon, but with the advent of dusk, the cloud become thicker and thicker. When i went out of the classroom, it rained cats and dogs...

J-POP

A year ago, when i fell in love with Yuki, i also changed my shoes of music --J-POP--my new lovely ones, after a whole years travel, one thing i found is it's the most suitable type i've never been with.

My J-POP experence commenced with some songs whose genres are more tent to American and European style, like AI, that almost couldn't be realized that she's from Japan. not only her voice, her songs type, but also her make-up..if she stood with artists from A&E, i'm sure no one would tell her Japanese backgroud!

And then i've got so many chances to get in touch with more Japanese stype of music, globe, pizzicato, Namie Amuro (she's one of my best favourate singer and also queen of hit-pop in Japan).....although getting understand the words part is still a tough part for me, just in terms from the melody, it's already good enough to be a splendid sight that exist in the universe between my ears.

girl right boy left

these days i found a very strange pheonomenon, that is the girl are always be on the right side of the boy when walking shoulder to shoulder. Acturally to my imagination, it should be inverse, because boys can protect girls when their right arms facing the outsite direction, of course the hint here is the assumption that most people are not left-handed.

I also inquired friends about this problem, one represented opinion from boys is that they can hand in hand with their gf, or hug their waists, which also can protect them from the possible dangerous. For example, when a car that out of control drove forward to them, the boy can push away the girl with the right hand that also with a bigger strenth. Then, what do their left hand do? One of them said it offten used to pick the bag or other staff like that.

Besides, let's have a look at girls' opinion! To my surprise, almost all the answers are they just feel like they should be on the right side, without any specific reason... then what does this 'feeling' really means? is that they need to be protected from their subconciouse? is right side more safer side in general? intereting social behaviour, isn't it? although tiny is it in the whole behaviour science, it still can express a general distinction between man and woman. And that is: Man are meant to be a protector of woman without controversy of woman. I think this charactoristic must be one of the few harmony in the current world betweem these two sides.

sleep well

Since my junior middle school, i learned to study in the deep night, with music flying around the space between my ears, with light moon and stars hanged in the sky. i like the feeling of embraced by the darkness, that seems the real peace ane quietness would fell, juct like the twinkling that Elizabeth start to play, the voice of shizuki, magically, brought audiences to the world of 闇.

I didn't sleep last night, it's not so much studying as enjoy the peacefulness presented by the midnight. I'm not sure why i chose yesterday to be a regression to my original life which i always belong to, but the consequence of changing is the new and 'advanced' lifestyle brought me more painfulness and less aquisitions, and the reason of which should be due to the more attention on courting the cost of what i lost that i never to be like.

3 days ago i asked my father how he handled his spoken en when lived in foreign countries in his early life, instead of answering my question, he talked about many staff about the obervious distinctions between easten and westen countries.. but, rudely, i interrupted his talking with impacience for the reason that he's not answering my question! and after that i realised that how stupid i was when dad explained the meaning of learning another language -- the real purpose hinting in the language learning should be getting to have a knowledge of the corresponding culture. In other words, it will be effortless to improve the spoken part to talk with local just with only one purpose, but multiaspects which, instead, help obtain a prograss imperceptibly. It means it will be more helpful if i can have an interest or will in understanding a different culture rather than just to get a high mark on the language test.

Undoubltly, learning with an interest is the happiest thing in the world, i draw, photograph, write, read because i like them, i can get a high mark on math is also because i like it. but recently the more i grow up, the less this thought exists, because the attitude to everything i'm doing is changing to a general one that for the money, reputation despite of the personality of oneself, which means I AM LOST myself in this world. how terrible it is...Forturenitely, i stop before i lost more. it's a scheme whose director owns thousend years life and implimentors are full of this world. i'm now understanding my father more and more and getting ready to continue his life unable to complete in that certain environment.

spitting blood

Seems finding a suitable partner of travelling is a bloody difficult thing for me, is that my problem? i used to be on holiday with various friends but apprently, we had different aim of going out. In other words, they seemed more interested and satisfired in the 'just looking' -- the thing is over after looking at the sight, photographing with the scupture, purchasing the suvirnier, but what i wish is to breath the air that unicle from other place, to sense the heart beat of ancient temple, to feel the origination of the honest thougts of locals, and of course, to photograph every detail of what i saw and what i feel.

Flinders Station(day)

Finders Station(night)

the meaning of travel

Resently I've got a chance to travel around MEL with a friend, exactly he is my friend's bf, came here for a so-called international conference or whatever, none of my business, what i care about was he would play with me rather than for that boring and meaningless 'no show'.

In the first day i picked him up at the Avelon airport -- a very small and cute internal airport and very far from the city, cost me 50minutes to get there. i remember there was a heavy fog that day, but when i reached Avelon, the fog was blowed up, the remoting mountains was around with the fog, it's so beatiful that made me forgot the tiring of getting up so early in the morning.

He's a tall and thin man and very easy-going, we talked a lot, but most of contents are about the knowledge of MEL, and to my surprice, he knows a great many information that even more than i can imagine!! Shame of me..friend told me that he read 3 books about Australia before coming here...wow... then i got to know what is the real attitude a travellor should have..pf....

In the first two days, i showed him the prospectus city in the centre of MEL where he also lived in. He said it's far more better than Sydney for the clearness and better setup. I haven't been there so can't comment on it for a while, but his critize dispel my idea of travelling there more or less. At the third day we went to the Great Ocien Road where sit in the surburb that almost 3 hours from city. I'm not sure whether it was lucky or not, with various weather condition we appreciate different sight of seaside, while it also brought out big trouble that walking and photographing in the rainy and freezing day really feel not convient, althougth still excited about 2 rainbows appeared over the sea at the same time...

st. killda beach

GREAT OCENT ROAD

hello nobody

hi, everybody, nobody, this is not my first blog acturally, the reason i move here is because i can't bear to write under the known people's eyes any more. remember in old days? people always record their daily life or happy thought or complaint on the diary book which is also highly personal that is not allowed to be open by others. yes, i admire thay way of writing because that is purally what we think about. but now, look what i've written before -- all of them are rubbish since every article is not just based on myself only, but a lot many other people, friends, strangers, for some purpose that would never come out but still existed.

so now, i decide not to chase that little hope for any reason, i just want to be myself. everybody is alone in this world, unavoidiable, the difference is only sit in whether u admit it or realise it. unforturanitly, i realized it and have to admit it -- extreme painful process, and thanks to someone i used to struggle to. without u and ur family, i may stay in a beautiful dream but far from the reality. i used to try to catch the truth in that dream, with some so-called pain, but i recogenized that it would never come out because there is no through way between these two worlds.

here is a totally strange place for me. fantasitc, isn't it? i feel free that appear from betraying. betraying is the most beautiful thing in this hopeless world because it represents the liberty that, satirely, is what human beings chased in the whole history.